Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
