hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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