I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
