My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
