dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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