Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
