I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
