The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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