its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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