no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
