i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize