btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Randomize