Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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