do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
