Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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