the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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