it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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