I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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