It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
