I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
