Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
