This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
