I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Blood and glitter go together right?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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