my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
