hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
BRING THE BAGELS
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
