She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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