Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
So vagazzling was a success
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