He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
