is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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