i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
