Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I love having hate sex.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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