Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
two words: eviction party
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
