I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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