I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
