Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Randomize
