yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Oh god it's open bar.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
