I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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