The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
