Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
