Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
