she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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