she looked like the before picture.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
