youre lurking in front of me
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
This house was built for laser tag.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
