yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
