Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
