i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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