Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
wow bdsm is so cute
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
