There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
