Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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