just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
