Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
