i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize