I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
